The feedback I'm talking about here isn't some sort of formalised appraisal that takes place with your team members every month, or every six months or once a year. This feedback happens continually and it happens when you see or hear something you want to give feedback on. The trick is - keep it simple. If you see or hear something you do like - you tell the team member about it. If you see or hear something you don't like or feel could be done better - you tell the team member about it and you coach them. Confirming Feedback is about giving the good news. It's about confirming to your team member that you approve of whatever it is you've seen them do or heard them say. It's a compliment or a thank you. It also seems to be something that some managers have great difficulty with. They take the attitude that - "why tell people that you're pleased with them when they're only doing what they're paid to do in the first place." A great deal of this attitude stems from managers believing they having to be big and tough and macho. And managers don't do all that touchy-feely stuff, saying thank you is for wimps. If you still feel a bit like that, think for a moment how you felt if a manager ever gave you a genuine compliment or a thank you for a job well done. I bet you felt pretty good and probably motivated to do even better. I'm also sure you didn't think your boss was a big softy or that he lacked courage; probably the opposite. Successful managers realise that almost everyone reacts positively to Confirming Feedback. They feel better about themselves and they feel motivated to repeat the behaviour. There is a saying that says - "You get more of what you reward." Michael LeBoeuf tells this fable in his book 'The Greatest Management Principle in the World.' - A man went fishing one day. He looked over the side of his boat and saw a snake with a frog in its mouth. Feeling sorry for the frog, he reached down, gently took the frog from the snake and set the frog free. But then he felt sorry for the snake. He looked around the boat, but he had no food. All he had was a bottle of whisky; so he opened the bottle and gave the snake a few shots. The snake want off happy, the frog was happy and the man was happy to have performed such a good deed. He thought everything was fine until about ten minutes passed and he heard something knock against the side of the boat. With stunned disbelief, the fisherman looked down and saw the snake was back with two frogs! So if you tell one of your team that you like the way they have completed some aspect of their work, then you'll find that they continue to do that work in the same way or probably even better. However, your feedback must be genuine. Sometimes on a seminar, I ask the group - "Who likes receiving compliments?" Often only a minority will put up their hand. I then ask them - "Who likes receiving a genuine compliment?" This time almost everyone puts up their hand. People often feel that a compliment isn't really meant and they sometimes feel a bit patronised. That's why it's important that your Confirming Feedback is genuine and it sounds genuine. Don't say it if you don't mean it! Sam Walton the founder of Wal-Mart once said - "Nothing else can substitute for a few well chosen, well timed, sincere words of praise. They're absolutely free and worth a fortune." Confirming Feedback is worth a fortune to you in terms of motivating your team and achieving your goals and targets. |
