In my thoughts tonight, I came upon something I have not considered before tonight, at least not this directly. At a real, right-now level, who am I? Silence in the face of the question is only an indication of the value of patience. Why am I, then, as I wait? Because. If I was not, then the "who am I?" question would be moot. It isn't. So, (trying to remain calm) who am I? We (it's a real issue, dealing with the whole pronoun thing when we are all one) are. Huh? We are. That's not an answer I understand. That's alright...it is not really an answer, but more a stance...a statement of being. Okay. Next: is this only an ego exercise, or is there real value in my scribing this conversation? What gives you the impression that this is an either/or proposition? I'm lost already, because I never set out to be figuring this out right now. It's not about "figuring it out" or otherwise calculating the universe. It is so much simpler than that. Gosh, then how do I work it to my advantage? Great question! You work it to your advantage by becoming an element in the universal flow of life. You really are such an element to begin with, so this is more about getting out of your own way than it is about learning a new talent. Still lost. Can you explain further? Think of it like this: if you are a leaf in a flowing river, you travel down the path the river has defined, you do so at the rate the river is flowing, and it all happens without you exerting any effort at all. You are a leaf. You are not making this easy for me at all. While I don't seek to judge, you are certainly correct to assume your comfort is not a concern. This is really frustrating for me, because I really want to live this life well, and I don't feel like I'm getting any help. What if living this life well was defined by you, governed by you, and graded only by you? I'm back, then, to that lost feeling I talked about before. Why is feeling lost something you interpret as a bad place to be? Isn't that the starting point, the strongest motivational origin, for learning who and why you are? Let's face it--if you were comfortable with the answers, you would not be here right now, asking me! I have to give you that one. My problem is, even if I grant you the stronger argument, what difference does it make in my day-to-day life? Is this just an intellectual exercise? There is no such thing. Any thought process you go through influences the way the universe operates. There are significant variations in the strength of that influence, but make no mistake: even when you are discounting your own influence, you are having a great influence! Right! So, back to my question...I hear you when you say my thoughts alone are a big factor. My concern right now is, how can I live a happier life? What does that mean to you? A clearer path? One with fewer perceived obstacles? I don't know! One where I am happier than I am now. Okay. Who is it that controls your happiness? |